Just Trying to Survive the Fourth Trimester
Let’s be real: When you have a baby, the idea of “winging it” is the furthest thing from helpful. Sure, you might be going into this journey thinking that you’ll “just figure it out,” but trust me, a little planning (or at least setting some basic intentions) can save your sanity. So, here’s the deal: Create a postpartum intention sheet, not a to-do list, because this isn't about “doing it all”—it’s about making it through the chaos with some shred of dignity left.
This is the stuff you actually need to consider in those first few weeks (and beyond). No sugar-coating, no Pinterest-perfect ideas—just the real, raw stuff.
1. Sleep—Or Lack Thereof
Intention: Get sleep whenever and wherever you can.
Reality: You’re probably not going to get a full night’s rest for a while, and that’s fine. But you do need to find a way to rest. Whether that’s napping while the baby naps (if you can) or asking someone to take over at night so you can catch a few hours—put your sleep on your intention sheet. Just know, it might look a lot messier than you imagined.
2. Food: Real Meals, Not Just Snacks
Intention: Eat. Like, real meals.
Reality: You’re probably going to end up eating cereal for dinner or living off of granola bars. And that's okay sometimes. But try to plan ahead so you have a few decent meals in the fridge or a meal train set up. Don’t try to be a hero here. You need fuel. Period.
3. Self-Care—But Not the Pinterest Kind
Intention: Do something that feels like self-care.
Reality: Yeah, a bubble bath sounds nice, but let’s be honest: you probably won’t have time for that. Self-care doesn’t have to be luxurious. It could just be taking a 10-minute shower without a baby screaming in the background or having a moment to not be touched by anyone. Write it down: 10 minutes of “me time” whenever you can grab it. It’s not selfish—it’s survival.
4. Mental Health: It’s Gonna Be a Rollercoaster
Intention: Check in on your mental health.
Reality: Postpartum can hit hard—emotionally, physically, mentally. You might feel like you're on an emotional rollercoaster, and that’s normal. But if you start feeling like you're sinking, make sure you’ve got someone to talk to. This isn’t just about surviving the sleepless nights; it's about surviving the emotional aftermath too. Therapy, friends, family, support groups—whatever it is, put it on your intention sheet. You’re allowed to ask for help.
5. Your Body (It’s Not the Same, and That’s Okay)
Intention: Let your body recover—without the pressure to bounce back.
Reality: Your body just did a whole lot of hard work, and it’s going to take time to heal. Whether you’re dealing with a C-section, vaginal tears, or just the general ache of being a new parent, don’t expect to snap back into shape right away. Your intention sheet should remind you to focus on recovery, not unrealistic expectations. Go slow. Be kind to yourself.
6. The Partner Check-In (Because You're In This Together)
Intention: Keep the lines of communication open.
Reality: It’s easy to forget that you’re still partners, not just parents. Postpartum can put a lot of strain on relationships, especially with the lack of sleep and added stress. Make sure to carve out moments to talk about how things are really going, even if it’s just a quick “How are you feeling?” during a 2 AM feeding. Don’t just survive this together—try to thrive together. (And that means honesty, not just smiling through the chaos.)
7. Let Go of the “Perfect”
Intention: Embrace the mess.
Reality: Your house is probably a disaster. You might not have showered in 2 days. And you may or may not have sent a text to a friend that says, “Please send wine.” That’s all part of it. The intention sheet here is simple: Let go of the pressure to be perfect. It's messy, it's hard, and some days it feels like you're failing. But guess what? You’re not. You’re doing the best you can—and that’s more than enough.
The Bottom Line
Your postpartum intention sheet is about making sure you’re still a human being through all the chaos. It’s about surviving—yes—but also finding little ways to thrive, even if that’s just 10 minutes of peace or having someone bring you a hot meal.
Don’t aim for perfection. Don’t try to do it all. Write down what you need, what you want, and what’s going to help you keep your head above water. And when you’re ready, remember that it’s okay to ask for support. Because after all, you’re not meant to do this alone.
And hey, if you need help making this all a reality, part of my work is creating realistic, no-bs plans with clients—whether it’s for individuals or couples. No fluff, no pretending everything is fine when it’s not. Just real strategies to help you navigate this new chapter without the overwhelm. When you're ready, we can start building a plan that actually works for you.
-Breanne
